It has now been 6 full weeks since Heather has been pregnant and the baby is still there. This may seem like a strange thing to notate, but anyone who has gone through pregnancy before knows that at this early stage it is a good day if nothing really happens.
It seems as though every time we get over one hurdle, there is another one just waiting for us to leap over. Two weeks ago we got the news that we had been waiting on for over a year. But once you get that news, it only opens up a thousand doors of worry. At least that is how I am.
My good friend, Eric, told me that I needed to be the strong one. The husband needs to be the steadyheaded one reassuring everything will work out. Heather is going through enough emotional and physical changes that she needs to be next to someone confident who won’t cause her anymore worry than she needs.
That makes sense to me and is easy to say… if you’re a normal person.
However, my father was kind enough to pass on to me at my birth his gene of Complete and Udder Worrywart.
Therefore, there has really been nothing in my life that I have gone through without the act of worrying about it.
So about a week after we got proof that Heather was indeed pregnant, we flew to Seattle for a friend's wedding.
Very shortly after our six hour flight we were in our hotel bathroom when she noticed that she started to spot light pink blood after going to the bathroom.
Great! We lost the baby. I knew we shouldn’t have flown in the first trimester. Without another thought I immediately picked up my iPhone and started looking up anything I could on the subject.
Bleeding during pregnancy, Spotting while pregnant, Blood after going to the bathroom while pregnant… were just a few of the search words I quickly typed into a Google search.
“Heath… is it a lot of blood?”
“No, just a little.”
“Ok, good. Cuz it says here that as long as it’s not “a lot” of blood… then we should be fine.”
Three hours later when there was blood again, the same fears came right back.
It was like we had never even read the first article.
“Heath… is it bright red?”
“No, just pink.”
“Ok, good. Cuz it says here that as long as it’s not “bright” red... then we should be fine.”
A few hours later I was looking at a different article with panic, once again, setting in.
“Heath…, do you have any sharp pains?”
“No.”
“Ok, good. Cuz it says here that as long as the bleeding is not accompanied by “sharp, shooting” pains... then we should be fine.
So there it is... one more thing the iPhone can do. I, of all people, hate to give unsolicited advertisement to any product, but I have to believe that if it wasn’t for this devise I wouldn’t have been able to follow Eric’s advise and act like the strong one, reassuring my wife that everything is going to be just fine. Without it, there is no telling what my panic could have done to us. To Heather. To our baby.
When we returned to New York, we had a scheduled ultrasound at our doctor’s office. Everything turned out to be fine. The baby is right where it should be and at normal size. The doctor also confirmed that spotting was common in pregnancy, and that some women could spot for the entire pregnancy. Great!
We left the doctor’s office feeling relieved.
A clean bill of health for our unborn child and we scheduled another appointment for two weeks to hear the heartbeat.
Another hurdle has been leaped.
Another crisis understood.
I feel good… but what if there’s no heartbeat in two weeks?
Stay strong my man, I say to myself.
I can do that.
Everything’s gonna be fine… as long as I have my iPhone with me.